Two weeks ago I experienced the joy of welcoming another little boy into the world. Beckham’s birth has blessed us as a new family of four. I have such gratitude for his health and the bond that’s already forming between him and my oldest son, Tatum.

As I find myself in this newborn season once again, I am filled with so much joy. Joy in the new addition to our family. Joy in all his tiny features. Joy even in the times we spend together in the wee hours of the night. I acknowledge that I am privileged to experience this joy as not all women are able to postpartum.

And while this is a time of such immense joy, it is also a time of such challenge and busy-ness. I have a toddler and newborn who are both very demanding of my time and attention, a new business to keep running even during my maternity leave, a husband to still find time for, and all of the many responsibilities that come with being a wife, mom, business owner, home owner. Not to mention the busyness that also accompanies the holiday season now here. Please don’t get me wrong - I am not complaining. I am so very blessed by all of these things! But that’s not to say our blessings can sometimes feel overwhelming and contribute to a season of busyness.

I recently finished the book, Defiant Joy. Ironically, this came at a perfect time as I find it very relevant to this current season of life. In the broken world we live in it can often be difficult to cultivate a life of joyfulness. Being defiantly joyful is choosing to revel in joy even in the midst of challenge and tragedy. It’s not denying these things, because wow do I ever feel the challenges of life right now. But rather it is taking heart in strength and resiliency to dig beyond the surface and choose to find and experience joy even when it may seem impossible.

In this season I am choosing joy.

What brings you joy? Make time for that.
Choosing joy brings my thoughts to “what actually does bring me joy?” I recently put some thought into this question. Part of choosing joy means identifying these things and making time for them in my life. Of course, my thoughts have to stay within reason, but that doesn’t mean I have to feel limited. While traveling brings me joy, that isn’t exactly an option right now. Rather I identified simple things like decorating my home for Christmas, drinking hot chocolate, reading, and conversations with my husband before we drift off to sleep. These are a few small and manageable things that can bring me joy in this busy season. These are the things I will make time for. By taking a little time for joy I feel lighter, nurtured, and energized to face the challenges ahead.

Take time for self-care.
Self-negligence often becomes the norm in busy seasons. Schedules and lists filled with tasks and to-dos find their way to the top of the priority list while our own needs sink to the bottom. Self-care looks very different for me these days. As a mom of two, I unfortunately don’t often have the option to take “me time”. Some days it’s hard to even find time to take a 5-minute shower just to clean the baby spit-up out of my hair. I will be the first to admit that self-care had never been one of my strong suits. I thought I thrived off of busyness and would become discontent with relaxing and an empty to-do list. I would fail to acknowledge how worn down and stressed this would make me until I would reach a breaking point. Thankfully, with some therapy and personal work, my self-care skills are improving.

Lately, my self-care is manifesting through the way I communicate. By saying “no” to things and asking for help. Both of these are NOT easy. It takes some internal work to break down my pride and admit that I can’t do this all alone. And it’s silly to think and expect that I can. There are many people who are willing to help with a simple ask. Given how busy this season is, I can’t afford to add much more to my plate. That doesn’t mean saying no to every single thing but being thoughtful and deliberate as to what will “add” and what will “take away”.

Slow down & live in the present.
If there’s one thing I learned from the time after Tatum, my oldest, was born it is that this time goes by so quickly. I’ve heard this said time and time again by every mom with older kids that time really flies by and to cherish every moment. You don’t realize how true that is until you experience it for yourself. Some days I really wonder where all the time has gone. Having been through this once before, I’m entering this newborn season once again but this time with a little different mindset.

When Tatum was a baby, I was very concerned with keeping up appearances. I wanted to be the mom with the baby who was the perfect sleeper, who always had a home-cooked meal on the table, a tidy home. Not that these things aren’t of some importance, but I let them consume me and, in the meantime, missed out on time and snuggles with my newborn son. These times are so fleeting, and I truly recognize that now. And with a toddler, new business, and approaching holidays this newborn season is busier than ever. My ability and willingness to slow down and savor has to come with a lot of intentionality. That means sometimes allowing the laundry to pile up, indulging in quick and convenient meals, and letting my baby sleep on me without the fear that he will become too “clingy”. These are not my natural tendencies and slowing down certainly presents its challenges. But when I find myself getting caught up in the mundane, I remind myself to live in the present and cherish every moment. These are times I don’t want to miss a single second of.

If you are finding yourself in the midst of a busy season of life you are not alone. The challenges felt during these times are so real, even among an abundance of blessings. Yet, you are capable. You are capable in every season of life. And joy is yours to be felt in the present, in the mundane, in the face of tragedy if you only choose it.

With Joy,

Have you ever heard of the phrase "relationship with food"? Lately there has been conversation that references this concept. But if you haven't heard of it, you may be wondering what exactly this means. After all, how can someone be in a relationship with food? And how exactly does one have a "healthy" relationship with food? Where do I even begin? It makes sense you might have all of these questions and more.

Let's start with what a relationship with food is.

The web definition of a relationship is:

The way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected

Think of a positive relationship you have with another person in your life. You are connected to them in one way or another through that relationship. Now think about the features of your relationship that make it a positive one. Although it's probably not a perfect relationship, it most likely brings enrichment and joy to your life. It probably also features strong values of trust, support, and communication. And since no relationship is perfectly harmonious, it must involve plenty of understanding, forgiveness, and doing your best in the face of challenges.

Now take these features of a healthy relationship and apply them to food. The relationship we have with food isn't all that different! Food is something we have to have a relationship with several times a day and it is one of our most important relationships.

A Healthy Relationship with Food Is...

Just like human relationships, a healthy relationship with food is one that features trust. Trusting your body and your body trusting that you will listen to it and be the provider of its needs. Your body communicates its needs to you and you listen to those needs - whether they are survival, hunger, satisfaction, or emotional. Your body then depends on you to care for it and respond to its needs accordingly. In return, food provides support through nourishment and satisfaction.

Like all relationships, your relationship with food is not one of perfection and you won't always make seemingly perfect decisions. But in a healthy relationship, you can still trust that your body will adapt and thrive even in these situations.

Most importantly, when you have a healthy relationship with food and you trust your body, you will have freedom and space for what matters most in life, whatever that is for you.

Ellyn Satter provides this definition of "normal eating", which is another great example of what a healthy relationship with food looks like.

A healthy, positive, and trusting relationship with food should be the norm, yet why is it elusive to so many?

Challenges of Creating a Healthy Relationship with Food

Unfortunately, having a healthy relationship with food is not the norm in our culture. Our culture teaches that our body cannot be trusted with decisions regarding health and well-being. That we must follow a set of rules and exert control over our body and choices.

Don't believe me? Think about how much messaging you're exposed to daily regarding dieting, weight loss, and thin bodies. Messages of "portion control", "guilt-free" and "zero calories" riddle the fronts of food packaging. Before and after photos come up while scrolling through social media. Restaurants now feature choices that fit the latest dieting trends. Your friends talk about their latest diet or "lifestyle" for "managing their weight".

These messages are only a few of many many examples. And they are impossible to escape. They tag our bodies and food as the enemy that must be controlled. It can be so easy for the ways of our culture to become our norm with these messages constantly inundating us. No wonder a trusting and positive relationship with food is so hard to come by these days.

If you feel far from having a healthy relationship with food it is not at all your fault. It is the fault of the environment and culture we live in. Building a healthy relationship with food is a real challenge in the midst of diet culture. Going against the cultural norm can be a scary and isolating experience. The path of sticking with these cultural ways may seem easier and more enticing. But think hard about this for a moment - is this really the easier path? By rejecting these messages and rules imposed by the culture and making a truce with food and your body, you will discover a life of peace and contentment with food.

Building a healthy relationship with food is a process of unlearning, relearning, trusting, and persevering and it is 100% possible. You deserve to have a nourishing and joyful relationship with food and you can start today.

A Healthy Relationship with Food Starts with Understanding

The first step towards building a healthy relationship with food is understanding. It is important to gain a deeper understanding of what your current relationship looks like and what has shaped it over the years.

Think back to your school days. Did you ever have a teacher give you a test on the first day of class? While this always seemed like the worst start to a new school year, the teacher had a method to their madness. What they were most likely doing through this test is taking an assessment of your prior knowledge. Every student comes to class with varying levels of knowledge and experiences. The teacher takes an assessment of this first to determine what and how they need to teach.

Just like taking an assessment test, doing an assessment of your food-related past and knowledge is a critical first step to achieving a long-term, healthy relationship with food. Besides, having a deeper understanding can then help guide you towards the next steps of building your new relationship.

Take a moment to reflect on your past and how your thoughts and feelings towards food have evolved. Consider exploring the following questions to get you thinking:

• What was food like in your house growing up?
• How did the people closest to you think about food and their body?
• What are some of your first memories about food? About your body? When did you notice these experiences and thoughts starting to change?
• Have there been times when you've felt neutral about food and your body? When was this and how has this changed?
• What are your current thoughts and feelings regarding food? Your body?
• What types of food and body messaging are you exposed to?

These are just a few questions to get your thinking started. There are years of history with food under your belt and therefore you cannot expect to understand it all in a matter of minutes and with just a few questions. Your relationship with food is one that is deep and complex and will take effortful thought and unpacking to really understand. And it will take time. There may be parts of your food-related past that you've never explored and may not be ready to and that's okay. Although with each piece you unpack and work to heal, you are making space for a new relationship to grow and flourish.

You're Deserving of a Healthy Relationship with Food

Establishing a trusting and positive relationship with food is so much easier said than done. The truth is that it is really hard and will not be a linear process. It is a process of unlearning, relearning, setbacks, and perseverance and will most certainly take time. It may make you sad, angry, and confused. That's okay. Allow yourself to feel those feelings and give yourself the space and time you need to adapt to these changes.

Notice any judgmental and chaotic thoughts and extend compassion and care to yourself. After all, the goal of creating these healthy relationships is all about caring for yourself in a better and more compassionate way. A newfound relationship with food is waiting for you, one that is authentic and unique to YOU. You are so deserving of it and you can start today.

So What's the Next Step?

Wondering what's next? After starting to understand your past relationship with food how do you move forward with creating a new one?

Well you're in luck! I have created a FREE guide with 6 simple steps to start healing your relationship with food today.

Click here to download your FREE guide and start your journey toward food freedom and joyful living.

With Joy,

Weight loss is highly sought after in our culture. And it is highly promoted. You probably can't go 5 minutes watching TV or driving past billboard before you see some advertisement related to "dropping weight " or "shedding pounds". After all, there are over 550,000 internet searches of "how to lose weight" every month. Everyone wants to know what the "magic formula" to weight loss is.

From the 1960s to the 1990s weight loss was all about achieving a certain aesthetic. People weren't concerned about health, they just wanted to be smaller no matter what it took (which was evident by all the questionable diet products on the market back then). In the early 2000s, the concept of weight loss shifted from being mostly about looks to being all about "health". The diet and even medical industry preach that in order to be healthy, you have to be a certain size and pursue diets and "lifestyles" to achieve this idea of optimal wellness.

I often encounter others asking for advice or coaching on weight loss. And many are shocked to hear that as a dietitian I don't promote weight loss. Rather, I promote health and health behaviors that empower people with the knowledge and ability to care for their own wellbeing.

After reading that are you thinking, "but don't you sometimes have to lose weight to be healthy? Isn't being 'overweight' unhealthy?"

If those questions are running through your head, I appreciate your curious mind. That is what we are taught to believe in our weight-obsessed, fat phobic society. But my answer to them is: absolutely not. And here's why.

BMI Is Flawed

Body Mass Index or "BMI" is a measurement that groups someone into a category based on their weight. Many health practitioners use this as a primary diagnostic tool to determine someone's health status, yet it is highly flawed. BMI is simply someone's weight relative to height, which physiologically makes no sense. Even the mathematician who created it in the 19th century said so. BMI categories aren't even based on scientific evidence but rather preference from large health associations and because certain numbers were easier to remember.

BMI can't distinguish between body fat, muscle, and bone and fails to take into account the many other parameters that indicate health. Someone who falls within a "normal" BMI may have health concerns that are being overlooked. And many people at high BMIs live healthy, long, and disease-free lives. High body weight and BMI does not equate poor health. Nor does "normal" weight and BMI indicate good health. Our wellbeing is far more nuanced than a flawed math equation.

Weight Loss Just Doesn't Work

Because BMI is used as a diagnostic tool, many people at higher weights are prescribed weight loss despite what their other health markers may indicate. In fact, many insurance providers require medical professionals to discuss weight loss with their patients who are above a certain body weight. Often this discussion and prescription looks like a restrictive diet in order to lose weight in the name of health. But research has shown that intentional weight loss efforts fail for 95% of the population and 60% of people end up regaining more weight than was lost after 5 years. Our focus on an outcome we can't control often leads to partaking in unsustainable behaviors. And obsession over the number on the scale often leads to a rollercoaster relationship. This yo-yo weight cycling tends to do more harm than good to our health taking into consideration the restrictive, extreme, and unsustainable relationship with food and stressed and obsessive mindset it causes.

Focusing on Weight is Stigmatizing

Diversity in body size exists just as race and gender diversity exist. And it is meant to exist. Hyperfocusing on weight and fatness marginalizes those living in larger bodies and creates a fear around body fat. Every day larger bodied individuals face weight discrimination, or weight stigma, whether through doctors telling them to lose weight, airplane and bus seats being too small, insurance companies refusing coverage, or lack of equality in the workplace (just to name a few). Weight stigma has become so prevalent in our society that most aren't even aware of the bias against weight they carry in their thoughts, attitudes, and comments. And the effects of weight stigma are crippling to overall health and wellbeing. It increases stress, weight cycling, chronic disease and eating disorders, negative body image, low self-esteem, and depression. All of these are much more detrimental to health than being at a higher weight.

Health is Not a Size

Our wellbeing goes far beyond the number on the scale. Changes in weight whether up or down can be an outcome of engaging in health behaviors. Weight is merely an outcome. And the deliberate focus and control of weight as the desired outcome rather than personal health is what can actually do more harm than good.

If weight loss isn't the answer to health, than what is? That is a very nuanced question that we don't have the exact answer to. What we do know based on scientific evidence is that weight is NOT an indicator of health nor does the obsession and control of weight make one healthy. Rather movement, sleep quality, stress load and management, social interactions, relationship to food, and mental health (and much more) are greater determinants of health. And by engaging in sustainable behaviors, your body will settle at a weight that's healthy for YOU.

If you're interested in working together on a weight-neutral approach to your health and wellbeing, please contact me. I would love to set up a free 15 minute discovery call to discuss your needs and how I can support you in your journey.

With Joy,

'Intuitive Eating' has become quite a buzzword lately. More and more people are hearing about it through social media and as major new stations and websites are reporting on it.

Although, with this recent rise in media popularity comes more confusion and misinformation. In fact, I've seen it referred to as a diet or method for weight loss, which is the complete opposite of what it is. So it's time to clear the air on Intuitive Eating. Whether you've heard of it or not, keep reading to find out what Intuitive Eating really is and how to make it a part of your lifestyle.

So, What Exactly Is Intuitive Eating?

Intuitive Eating is an approach to health that was developed in 1995 by two registered dietitians, Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch. It is a non-diet and weight-neutral framework that invites you trust your own wisdom and signals to meet your unique physical and psychological needs. It focuses on nurturing your body based on your individual needs and preferences, reconnecting with your body's innate signals of hunger, fullness, and food preference, and leaving behind diets forever to create a peaceful relationship with food and body.

In short, Intuitive Eating is attunement among mind, body, and food.

"Peacefulness" and "freedom" are not often words associated with eating. In a world where diets and restriction rule, many feel far from experiencing freedom with food and eating. Yet, this is what is experienced through Intuitive Eating. Intuitive Eaters are able to "make food choices without experiencing guilt or an ethical dilemma, honor hunger, respect fullness, and enjoy the pleasures of eating." They give themselves unconditional permission to allow all foods without guilt and rely on their own feelings of hunger, fullness, and satisfaction to guide them on when, what, and how much to eat.

Intuitive Eating is evidence-based and grounded in good, strong research. A number of studies have found positive physical and mental health attributes among Intuitive Eaters including:

• Increased self-esteem
• Increased body appreciation and acceptance
• Increased well-being and optimism
• Higher HDL cholesterol levels
• Lower triglycerides
• Lower rates of disordered eating
• Lower rates of emotional eating

What Intuitive Eating ISN'T

Did you know you were once an Intuitive Eater? That's right - we are all born with the innate ability to listen to and honor our hunger and fullness. As we grow older we are conditioned to follow rules when it comes to eating - only eating at certain times, viewing foods as "good" and "bad", having to clean our plate, restricting and limiting foods, using food as a reward system, etc. and we lose touch with our inner intuition.

Where culture and diets normally impose restrictions and rules, intuitive eating is the opposite. There is no counting of calories, macronutrients, pounds, or measuring out portions and following strict meal plans. Rather, Intuitive Eating invites you to ditch the dieting mentality and relearn to rely on your internal cues and inner wisdom.

Our culture is taking away our ability to eating intuitively. But the good news is that you can reclaim your eating and become an intuitive eater again.

10 Principles of Intuitive Eating

Intuitive Eating is made up of the following 10 principles.

1. Reject the Diet Mentality. We live in a culture caught up in dieting, restriction, and control and obsession over the perfect body and optimal "health". And when our culture praises thinness and dieting and rejects the opposite, it is very easy to get caught up in it. The realities of dieting and weight loss are that 95% of weight loss attempts fail and result in even additional weight regain. Rejecting the construct of dieting, weight loss, and the grip it has on you is the first and crucial step towards becoming and Intuitive Eater. Reflect on your past experiences and recognize the harm that dieting has caused. Let yourself off its hook and ditch all of the things that still tie you to a dieting mentality - books, scales, social media followings. Start to let go of the goal to change your body and focus on your overall well-being instead.
2. Honor Your Hunger. Hunger is 100% normal and is a biological drive that our body is built with in order to keep us alive. If we ignore feelings of hunger and don't eat, our body will react with extreme hunger and cravings driving us to binge. Learn to listen to your inner biological drive for food and trust and feed your body when it's hungry.
3. Make Peace with Food. Give yourself unconditional permission to eat ALL foods. Restricting and depriving yourself of certain foods and viewing foods as "good" and "bad" can lead to uncontrollable cravings, eventual "giving in" to these foods, and subsequently feeling as if you've "overindulged". Stop the vicious cycle and free your food choices by allowing all of them without any other agenda.
4. Challenge the Food Police. The Food Police is your inner dialogue that tells you you're "good" for eating vegetables and "bad" for eating birthday cake. These are unreasonable and guilt-provoking rules conditioned by diet culture and are housed deep in your brain. Learning to challenge this voice with caring and non-judgmental thoughts is an important step towards nourishing and pleasurable food experiences.
5. Feel Your Fullness. Learn to observe signals and listen to feelings of fullness and satiation. Pause and become mindful of the transition from empty to full stomach that occurs during a meal. Giving yourself permission to eat again if hungry can allow you to more easily honor your body's satiety signals.
6. Discover the Satisfaction Factor. Food is rewarding - it's in our biology. Our bodies have the innate ability to get pleasure from food since it is so fundamental for our survival. Although, this aspect of food is often overlooked and forgotten. Eating food that truly satisfies us gives us feelings of pleasure and contentment (and often with less food.)
7. Cope with Your Emotions Without Using Food. Food is strongly tied to our emotions. Feeling emotions and eating in response to these emotions is 100% normal. While food is a source of comfort, it can become a problem if it's your only coping mechanism and you're not addressing your emotions. Building a bank of coping mechanisms is important for soothing emotions and learning to eat intuitively.
8. Respect Your Body. Bodies are diverse and they are MEANT to be this way. Just like we can't expect a Great Dane to scale down to the size of a Chihuahua, it's just as unrealistic to have this expectation with body size. Being unrealistic and overly critical of your body only makes rejecting diet culture and caring for yourself more difficult. Learn to accept, respect, and care for your here and now body.
9. Exercise - Feel the Difference. What if you shifted your mindset on exercise from "have to" to how movement makes you feel? Movement should be something that is enjoyable and makes you feel good. Only thinking about how exercise is going to physically change your body shape lacks sustainable motivation.
10. Honor Your Health - Gentle Nutrition. Embracing gentle nutrition is the last and final step of Intuitive Eating. Base your food choices on what feels good in your body while also considering taste and satisfaction. Food is not all or nothing, rather it's the combinative effect of what you consistently eat over time.

Interested in learning more about Intuitive Eating?

The Joyful Life embodies an Intuitive Eating approach through our nutrition counseling. We work with clients individually in-person in our Grimes, Iowa office as well as virtually from all throughout the US. Learn more about our nutrition counseling services where we will help you get back in touch with your inner intuitive eater and cultivate a peaceful relationship with food.

With Joy,

In the age of social media, most of us have seen #bodypositivity and #bodylove being shared across multiple platforms as well as photos of people of all different sizes sharing how they love their body despite its "flaws". Body positivity has become a movement. But there are flaws in this movement. It is a positive step in the way we view and talk about bodies - for love to be felt, expressed, and shared regarding all bodies, but it is still too tied up in outward appearance and cultural definitions of beauty. "Body love" also continues to reinforce the ideal that our worth = our body; that we are bodies first and people second. There is still a lot wrong with that.

Not to mention, there are many people who still aren't able to identify with this movement. Finding a place of love for their body seems absolutely so far-fetched and body positivity therefore impossible. It has also been twisted into the ideal that changing your body is a form of or will result in loving your body.

Based on the statistic that over 90% of women are dissatisfied with their bodies, I would venture to guess that most aren't able to identify with #bodylove. After all, when we live in a culture that praises thinness and flawless looks how can we possibly love every inch of our body?

I'm here to tell you that it's okay to not love your body. It's okay to be so far from body love. And even if you have found a love for every flaw and less-than-perfect part there will be moments when that love will be difficult to feel and exude. This is where body acceptance comes into play.

What is Body Acceptance?

Body acceptance is just as it sounds - accepting your body just as it is today. Body acceptance is taking all of the parts and pieces you love and the ones you don't and accepting that their collection is what makes up your body. Body acceptance is acknowledging and accepting that we only get one body in this lifetime and this is it. No matter how you feel about it, this is the body you've always had and the best one you'll ever have. Even if you don't love what you see in the mirror, body acceptance is being able to step back and know that that's okay.

Frankly, only a minute piece of body acceptance has to do with your actual physical appearance. Body image is not an objective standard. For one, your body is constantly changing, as it should be, so focusing on a stagnant appearance is relatively counterproductive to accepting your body. Additionally, your body is only our outward appearance, your "earth suit". Your body is simply a vessel for who you actually are - your personality, values, beliefs, memories, and experiences that truly make you YOU. Body acceptance is more about how you treat your body and finding respect and appreciation for all it does and all it contains. Body acceptance is also finding a life outside of your body and appearance.

How Do I Practice Body Acceptance?

In practice, body acceptance is providing respect and care for your body no matter what size or shape it comes in and despite how you feel about it. All bodies are deserving of being treated with respect, even yours. If body acceptance is a new venture you're stepping into, here are some ways you can start your journey today.

1. Give Yourself Space and Time.

If you are coming from a place of feeling a lot of negativity towards your body, transitioning to a new way of thinking about your body will most likely be a difficult process. It may make you sad, confused, angry, and it will most certainly take time. After all, our struggles with body image are not rooted in our actual physical appearance but rather in our mindset and our perceptions. Changing your mindset is not an easy task but you can start today. Give yourself the space and time you need to adapt to this new change.

2. Find Values Outside of Your Body.

If you were to make a list of everything you value in your life, where would your body (or appearance) fall? Would it even make the list? Although "body love" is a positive message and may help short-term, it isn't the ultimate goal because it continues to put value in outward appearance. Rather, respect and accept your body while finding love and worth in your LIFE. As therapist and body image expert, Jennifer Rollin puts it: You don't need to fall in love with your body but fall in love with your life.

3. Express Body Gratitude.

When is the last time you thanked your body or even thought about all that it does for you? When you are having a vulnerable day in your body, step away from the mirror and and focus instead on your body's many amazing capabilities - your heart pumping life through your body, your legs that carry you places, your arms that share warm embraces, your mouth for sharing your day's experiences. Make a list for a day and you may be surprised by all the things we often take for granted.

4. Surround Yourself with Positive Influences.

Body acceptance becomes a slightly easier process when you're surrounded by an environment that cultivates body acceptance. Analyze your environment - does it contain social media accounts and email subscriptions that make you feel bad about your body? Does it contain magazines and books telling you your body isn't good enough? You have the power to unfollow and get rid of these things. Give yourself permission to create an environment that allows you to feel good about yourself.

5. Wear Clothes That Fit.

Part of showing your body respect is providing it comfort. Fill your closet with clothes that fit your here and now body. Make the choice to invest in clothing that fits, is comfortable, and you feel confident in.

6. Eat.

Eating is one of the best ways you can provide care for your body. Establish an eating pattern that allows you to frequently nourish your body according to your hunger/fullness levels and satisfaction needs. This may look like 3 meals and 2-3 snacks. Your body needs this nourishment every day, no matter what or the amount you ate yesterday.

Body acceptance is not a permanent destination, rather it is an ever evolving process. It involves continuous practice and putting in the work to accept your body. There will still be triggers, messages, and "bad body image days". But body acceptance is possible in your here and now body.

You don't have to love your body to be kind and generous to it. You don't have to love your body to accept that it is worthy of respect and care. You don't have to love your body to love your life. You are worthy just as you are.

With Joy,

Let's talk about hunger.

Hunger is one of your most important biological drives. It is your body's way of saying "hey, feed me!" so that it can get the food it needs to stay alive.

But what exactly IS hunger? And why is it so important?

Let's start with a brief science lesson.

After you eat, your body goes to work on digesting, storing, and utilizing the energy it just received. Once a significant portion of that energy (in the form of glucose) is used up, your blood glucose (or "blood sugar") and insulin (the hormone responsible for transporting glucose to your cells) levels will start to drop. This drop triggers a hormone to tell your brain that your body is in need of food for more energy. The hypothalamus, the part of your brain that receives these messages, releases another hormone called neuropeptide Y (NPY). It stimulates your appetite, and in particular your drive for carbohydrates, your brain's primary fuel source.

If you go too long ignoring your body's need for food, NPY signals increase driving the body to seek more food and carbohydrates. This can lead to over consumption, not because you're out of control, but because your body is literally screaming for food.

When we do eat, before those NPY signals get too strong, serotonin and leptin are produced which turn off our appetite and produce feelings of satisfaction.

Why Hunger Can Be Challenging

Hunger is a true-mind body connection. Food is so essential for your survival that both your body AND brain are involved creating your drive to eat. This causes you to feel hunger both physically and psychologically.

If you body has such efficient systems in place then why might it be hard to feel hunger at times? And why may it be even harder to honor it and eat when you are hungry?

Hunger has become complicated and nuanced, but it's not necessarily meant to be. People are being told that they need to control and suppress their hunger. There are tons of "tips and tricks" devoted to ways to reduce appetite - just do a simple google search and you'll find thousands of articles with these techniques. If you're a dieter you've probably engaged in some of these tricks as most diets involve caloric restriction and subsequent ignorance of hunger to lose weight.

Even if you're not a classic dieter, it's still possible that you've lost touch with your hunger cues. We live in a world full of busyness and distractions at every turn. If you don't take the time to listen for your hunger, it's going to be very difficult to feel it and therefore honor it.

Whether you're a dieter or chronic busy person, when you continually ignore or don't pay attention to your hunger cues, you lose touch with your body and its signals.

3 Steps to Honor Your Hunger

Maybe you've realized you've become out of tune with your hunger cues. The good news is, you can learn to listen again.

1. Be mindful of your hunger.

Before you eat your next meal take a couple minutes to pause and take a few deep breaths. (Close your eyes if it helps you focus better).

Ask yourself the following questions:

• Am I hungry?
• What's my current hunger level? (neutral, moderately hungry, ravenous)
• How does my stomach feel? (gurgling, gnawing, growling, discomfort)
• How does my mouth feel?
• Do I feel light-headed or faint?
• Do I have a headache?
• Am I irritable or moody?
• Am I having difficulty concentrating?
• When was the last time I felt hungry?

These are all many ways that hunger can present itself in your body. However, hunger is extremely unique and maybe you've recognized other ways that you feel hunger. Because it's so individual, our hunger doesn't align perfectly with the time of day or with other's eating patterns. You may be hungry for lunch at 10:30 am while someone else isn't hungry until 12:30 pm. Your own hunger will vary from day to day too. That's all totally normal!

If you find that you don't get any signals like this, a general guideline is to eat every 3-5 hours until you can become more in tune with your signals. (This is NOT a rule, but simply a guideline). Once you are more in tune, you'll most likely find that your body follows this pattern anyway since your energy stores in your liver run out every 3-6 hours.

2. Utilize the Hunger Scale.

The hunger scale is a great tool to help you check in with your hunger on a regular basis. By using this, you can start to get reacquainted with your body and maybe even recognize some patterns emerging with your hunger.

This scale is purely objective and there is no right or wrong way to use it - it is simply a tool to increase your awareness.

A "1" on the scale is being so ravenously hungry that you may even feel physically ill.

A "10" is feeling so full and uncomfortable that you may actually feel sick.

A "5" is neutral where you are neither hungry nor full.

A happy place to be is between 3 and 8. Here you are able to feel both hunger and fullness but they aren't so intense that you feel sick and uncomfortable. There are times you may be outside of the 3-8 zone for various reasons and that's okay!

3. Other Types of Hunger.

The hunger scale seems pretty cut and dry right? Eat when you're hungry and stop when you're full? Well, not necessarily. And in fact, that type of black and white thinking is what can lead to even more rules and complications when it comes to listening to your body and honoring its needs.

• Practical hunger.

In an ideal world we would all have the perfect schedule every day where we could sit down and have the time to eat every time we hit a 3 on the hunger scale. Well unfortunately that perfect schedule doesn't always exist and sometimes we get stuck in long meetings, classes, or plane rides.

This is when planned overeating comes into play. I know you may be thinking, "Hold on, isn't that going against eating intuitively and listening to your body?". But hear me out.

Let's say you know you're going to be in a meeting from 12-3 pm. It's 11 am and you're not hungry now but you know you definitely will be in a couple hours when you're in the middle of the meeting. Making the choice to eat now may make you feel slightly fuller than usual, but it will keep you from becoming ravenous and will allow you to stay focused in your meeting.

• Taste hunger.

Food is heavily rooted in our culture and plays a large role in creating joyous experiences. Eating food because the occasion calls for it allows you to really take part in the celebration. Even if you aren't hungry, if a food sounds delicious to you, eat it! I find that this happens when traveling and you're able to experience foods you don't normally get to. You don't want to miss out so if you really want it, let yourself eat it. It's important to be able to enjoy foods without rules or guilt. Satisfaction (whether your hungry or not) is a part of eating intuitively!

• Emotional hunger.

As you begin to listen to and feel your hunger better, you may be able to distinguish your "why" behind eating. We know, as discussed earlier, that hunger has a strong mental presence. Our hypothalamus, that's responsible for cueing hunger signals, is ironically also in charge of our emotional responses. Food is naturally tied to emotions. Food is a source of comfort. Hunger is uncomfortable and eating food allows us to feel comfortable again. Eating for an emotional need receives a bad rep but it is not something to feel bad nor guilty about. I will talk about this more in depth in another post, but know that feeling emotions and eating because of those emotions is all perfectly normal.

Thoughts? Questions? Drop them in the comments below. I'd love to hear from you!

With Joy,

I am a dietitian.

There are so many layers and nuances to the word “dietitian”, which I didn’t realize until I officially became registered. And now, I’m working to break that word down.

When you think of a dietitian, what comes to mind?

A simple Google image search results in photos of only women pictured with white lab coats, fruits and vegetables, measuring tapes, and scales. Based on these images, someone would be right to assume that dietitians only tell you to eat fruits and vegetables and are heavily concerned about your weight and size. Many also think of dietitians as the food police, governing what you can and cannot eat, and think that we judge every aspect of your meal. No wonder dietitians don’t always get a good reputation – who would want to subject themselves to that?

Our societal view of dietitians is sorely mistaken and that needs to change.

I associate with a category of dietitians that describe themselves as “non-diet” dietitians. Everyday these brave individuals are working to break the norm and stigma associated with our title. I 100% identify with this group and I strive to ensure that that is evident in my everyday work and my approach with clients.

What exactly is a non-diet dietitian? Afterall, the word “diet” is in dietitian, isn't it?

A non-diet dietitian doesn’t prescribe diets.

A non-diet dietitian approaches health holistically meaning we take into account your whole being – your physical, mental, and emotional health. Rather than encouraging you to engage in diets, which are often accompanied with strict rules, restrictive eating, food group elimination, and limiting and counting calories, we focus on your relationship with and behaviors around food. We work with you to better this relationship and help you reach your individual non-weight related health goals.

A non-diet dietitian makes all foods fit.

No food police here. There are no good and bad foods and we strive to remove this labeling from food. All food is capable of nourishment, providing energy, and pleasure. We work with you to provide permission to eat all foods freely without rules or restrictions and bring the joy back to eating.

A non-diet dietitian smashes the scale.

We separate weight and health and the idea that these two are significantly correlated. Weight tells us virtually nothing about your individual health, habits, or your worth. Besides, weight is merely a number, not a behavior that can be controlled. This seems a bit radical, huh? Well research has shown over and over again that 95-97% of weight loss attempts fail and inevitably rebound with further weight gain. This weight cycling can begin to damage your body’s natural workings, messengers, and metabolism which only separates you further from health. Every body and size is capable of health, regardless of weight. So instead, we help you attain health outcomes and behavior changes without weight manipulation.

A non-diet dietitian is inclusive to all bodies.

We are not exclusive and welcome all bodies and sizes, no matter what. We work to remove weight stigma – the negativity towards people in larger bodies – from health care and create a safe space for everyone in our practice. Because every body is deserving of excellent and inclusive care.

A non-diet dietitian embraces the journey with you.

Non-diet dietitians typically have more training in counseling, behavioral therapies, and motivational interviewing. We listen A LOT and give you the space to share whatever you need so that we can aim to understand the entire picture. We strive to be a strong support and cheerleader for you. We will never judge or be mad for a mistake you’ve made in the process. That’s part of the process! We celebrate the journey with you and we work to help you overcome the hurdles and find joy in the process.

A non-diet dietitian still focuses on nutrition.

We are still dietitians and nutrition is our language! We want you to feel nourished and it’s our job to make sure you are getting what you need. We encourage variety and satisfaction – after all that’s what our bodies love and thrive from. We explore with you what foods you like and make sure you’re eating foods you enjoy.

One last takeaway: food and nutrition is important, but it’s only a small blip on the radar of life. If you feel that it is consuming your life, consider working with a non-diet dietitian to help you reclaim your life and health.

Our goal at The Joyful Life is to address your individual needs and support you to bring joy and freedom back to food and health. Check out our philosophy and contact us to start your journey to a joyful life.

With Joy,